08-18-2008, 09:12 PM
Here you can post jokes.
08-18-2008, 09:16 PM
Computer:"You need a new chair!"
Computer:"You need a new desk!"
Computer:"You need some new slippers!"
Man: (Destroying computer)
Computer: (Quetly)"You neeeeddd aaaaa nnnnneeeeeeww computer!"
Computer:"You need a new desk!"
Computer:"You need some new slippers!"
Man: (Destroying computer)
Computer: (Quetly)"You neeeeddd aaaaa nnnnneeeeeeww computer!"
08-18-2008, 10:03 PM
How come I can post jokes here?
08-19-2008, 12:26 AM
George Bush goes to a primary school to talk to the kids to get a little PR. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him his name. Stanley, responds the little boy. And what is your question, Stanley?
I have 4 questions: First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why are we so worried about gay-marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance?
Just then, the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, " OK, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?" Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him his name. Steve, he responds. And what is your question, Steve?
Actually, I have 6 questions: First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why are we so worried about gay marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance? Fifth, why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early? And sixth, what happened to Stanley?
I have 4 questions: First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why are we so worried about gay-marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance?
Just then, the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, " OK, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?" Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him his name. Steve, he responds. And what is your question, Steve?
Actually, I have 6 questions: First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why are we so worried about gay marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance? Fifth, why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early? And sixth, what happened to Stanley?
08-19-2008, 07:03 AM
hahahahahahahahahhahahaha
bush, the queen of england,queen of netherlands and nelson mandela
and a little schoolkid are in a crasshing plane only, there are 5 safety packs
, the pilot takes the first one.
then queen of england says, i need to be for my people and she takes a pack and jump out
then the netherland queen, she says i need to take care of my country, and she takes a pack and jumps out
then bush says: i need to send troops to iraq
he takes a pack and jump out
then nelson says to the little scool kid:
u go im old and you have a whole live comming
then the little schoolkid says they both can go : bush took the schoolkids schoolbag ^^
bush, the queen of england,queen of netherlands and nelson mandela
and a little schoolkid are in a crasshing plane only, there are 5 safety packs
, the pilot takes the first one.
then queen of england says, i need to be for my people and she takes a pack and jump out
then the netherland queen, she says i need to take care of my country, and she takes a pack and jumps out
then bush says: i need to send troops to iraq
he takes a pack and jump out
then nelson says to the little scool kid:
u go im old and you have a whole live comming
then the little schoolkid says they both can go : bush took the schoolkids schoolbag ^^
08-19-2008, 07:34 AM
If astronauts train in water,
Why don't divers train in cosmos?
Why don't divers train in cosmos?
08-19-2008, 07:36 AM
The good thing about the animals is that they can't talk...
08-19-2008, 03:14 PM
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work.
Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home.
She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.
The little boy says, "Dark in here." The man says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$150"
Man - "Sold."
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together.
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a Wilson infielder's glove."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy - "$350"
Man - "Highway robbery. Sold"
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your gloves, let's go outside and have a game of catch." The boy says, "I can't, I sold my ball and my glove." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" The boy says, "$500" The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that ... that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess your greed." They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."The priest says, "Don't start that sh*t again, you're in MY closet now."
Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home.
She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.
The little boy says, "Dark in here." The man says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$150"
Man - "Sold."
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together.
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a Wilson infielder's glove."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy - "$350"
Man - "Highway robbery. Sold"
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your gloves, let's go outside and have a game of catch." The boy says, "I can't, I sold my ball and my glove." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" The boy says, "$500" The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that ... that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess your greed." They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."The priest says, "Don't start that sh*t again, you're in MY closet now."
08-19-2008, 07:43 PM
Three men arrive in heaven. Petrus asks which vehicle they deserve. First: 20 years married, always faithful. A great Ferrari arrives. Second: 10 years married, not always faithful. A Toyota arrives. Third: Almost never faithful. A Mini arrives.
Now they drives through the heaven, till the driverof the Ferrari stops and cries. The two others aks him what happened. " I've seen my wife, on a skatebord"
Now they drives through the heaven, till the driverof the Ferrari stops and cries. The two others aks him what happened. " I've seen my wife, on a skatebord"
08-24-2008, 08:23 AM
Thanks guys.Everything you have posted was funny.